The RoxBottom Blake Street Bums will be done for, destroyed, devastated and the disgraceful dead Friday. Thank heavens, Galarraga and the 162nd last game.

In five seasons, the foolish, frightful, ferocious, foul franchise will finish with more than 500 failures.

“We are No. 30 and have a party deck’’ should be team slogan.

The Mortified Montfort Meatpackers have turned the local league baseball team into a slaughterhouse.

“If the Rockies should crumble …’’

In 2021 the Rox lost 87 and 93 the next season. Then they hit bad bottom with 103 in ’22, 102 in ’24 and 112 (and diving deeper). The total is 112 reaches to 129 this year will earn the magic mark of being the worst club in all of baseball. They will manage an average of 20 games out of first place in the National League with the pinnacle of probably 40-plus games behind the Dodgers at season’s end. They will be fortunate to end up with the third-most defeats in baseball’s modern-day history. They were torched for more than 1000 runs by the opposition and a run difference of more than 400 runs.

The rotation will compile the highest earned-run mess ever, and those starters could end up with records of Kyle Freeland (4-16), Antonio Sanzetela (4-15), German Marquez (3-14), rookie Chase Dollander (2-12) and dearly departed Austin Gomber (0-7) and not one with a winning record.

Quite possibly the Rockies produced the worst pitching staff in MLB history.

The owner of the Rockies predicted a solid pitching staff and the best defense of all time. The Roxbottoms ended up next to last in the national League, the pitching was porous, and they also were an also ran, particularly in home run and stole bases. This guy once suggested the Pox would win 95 games and claimed to be the best evaluator in the game.

So much for his evaluation of Kris Bryant, who was signed by fanboy personally as one of the sharpest players in the game for the next seven years at $172 million. Bryant hasn’t been worth $173. The Rockies could have signed four starters instead of one position player who can’t play any position except left out.

The Rockies supposedly have a draft and development philosophy, but really are a daft and envelope team.

But there’s not a chance in Greeley, the Monfort family farm, of the Rockies signing a genuine star especially a starting pitcher or an Asian pitcher, a Cuban who could be an MVP candidate or an African-American who would be an annual All-Star.

They prefer to draft a high school kid who attends Sunday school regularly and plays backup utilityman and hits .227.

The RockBottoms have been stuck in the ditch since Dick, a restaurateur and Brett Favre steak house owner, took over as owner, CEO, president, snow shoveler and cheapest owner and inexperienced baseball executive. He couldn’t pick a cow from a first basemen or a Palm Tree resort from a pastry.

Dick Monfort is too busy buying up downtown buildings to buying a quality closer. If you think ’23, ’24 and ’25 were reprehensible just wait until he keeps a general manager whose loyalty is picking lunch, not a trade. And, Delusional Dick is promoting his sons to run the franchise even though neither has been employed by a winning franchise. Monfort won’t even interview executives who have Colorado backgrounds or championship rings.

There are dozens of baseball experts who could assume control and bring a new concept to the franchise.

Instead, Dick wants to run the franchise himself from his penthouse overlooking Coors Field, and add pony rides to the party palace.

Dick isn’t interested in winning. He wants a salary cap to even the score.

If 2025 was horrific, just get ready for ’26.

Season tickets are on sale now. Get ‘em while they’re hot.

The Roxbottoms can go lower in LODO. 

This horrible season ends Friday. The next horrific season begins anew in 2026.