My wife, Julie, who I met, dated, and married in Colorado Springs, advised against addressing this topic Valentine’s Day week – but since “fools rush in where angels fear to tread” – here it goes.

A 2026 Consumer Affairs study ranked Colorado Springs the worst city for dating. Out of 110 towns evaluated, the Pikes Peak region was dead last, just ahead of Chula Vista, Calif., and 109 spots away from the best – Rochester, New York.

To level set, it might be helpful to acknowledge that “best and worst” lists are largely subjective, often gimmicky, and usually only fodder for news outlets, social media chatter, and Chamber of Commerce representatives. To be fair, these lists can be a point of pride, too. We like it when our hometown tops a good list, don’t worry when it doesn’t, but begin to ask questions when it’s at the bottom.

Two years ago, U.S. News & World Report ranked Colorado Springs the third best place to live. Last year, that same publication dropped us all the way down to number 406. They cited a rise in crime and increased cost of living for the precipitous decline.

Granted there could be a negative correlation between crime and the absence of Cupid, but the folks at Consumer Affairs claim one of the main obstacles we’re facing is that our “social spots are just less dense compared with top-ranked cities.”

Editors also cited the high cost of rent as a factor leading to fewer singles settling in the Springs, thereby reducing the pool of available bachelors or bachelorettes.

Life is certainly more expensive everywhere, and getting around Colorado Springs does favor those with access to a car. But it was the country star Johnny Lee who may have pinpointed one of the real culprits behind the city’s alleged dating dearth. “I was lookin’ for love in all the wrong places,” sang the Texas native. “Lookin’ for love in too many faces.”

Singles struggling to find a date or frustrated with who they may find, might want to reconsider where they’re looking, who they’re looking for – and even ask difficult but important questions of themselves.

Johnny Lee wasn’t being dictatorial, but as a general rule of thumb, where you look for someone has a whole lot to do with who you might find.

Churches are better places to meet a lasting love than a bar. You’re also more likely to connect on a meaningful level with someone who shares some of the wholesome things you also enjoy – whether it’s exploring the great outdoors, singing, playing an instrument, or painting. Rather than going to a club to drink and hook up, consider joining one of the many hobby clubs in the city where you’d be surrounded by like-minded people.

Herein lies a fundamental flaw and trend of human nature: many of us don’t know who or what we want in many areas of life, and especially when it comes to platonic or even romantic relationships.

The British writer C.S. Lewis was right when he observed our desires aren’t too strong – but too weak. “We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea,” he wrote.

Looking for love in the right places is a good start, but Lee’s warning about looking for it “in too many faces” is equally important. This might sound counterintuitive, but one of the best ways to find a date is to stop looking for someone to love and instead find someone whose company you enjoy. Whether hiking, eating or driving together, I quickly discovered 26 years ago just how much I simply enjoyed being with Julie.

Heartache and loneliness are real challenges, but before pinning the blame for your singleness on a city, you might ask yourself: Am I living my life in a way that deserves the type of mate I’m seeking? Am I looking for selfish pleasure or a substantive companion to serve? Am I more interested in finding out about the other person than trying to brag and boast about myself?

A city isn’t an excuse, and a cure for your dating woes won’t be found in more bars or cheaper rent. Instead of changing location, exasperated singles might want to consider changing tactics and even themselves.

Paul J. Batura is a local writer and founder of the 4:8 Media Network. He can be reached via email Paul@PaulBatura.com or on X @PaulBatura.