Reports say rising incivility harms Americans in many ways, including their personal lives (relationships broken over politics), their work (employees reportedly face 190 million uncivil acts per day), and in government (majorities say division keeps it from functioning as it could).

Starting this week, founders of a local business named Reclaiming Civility are teaming up with the national nonprofit Braver Angels to do something about it.

Together, the two groups are hosting a series of face-to-face gatherings called Crossing the Continental Divide designed to promote civility by helping people learn the skills they need to disagree without being disagreeable.

“We have very loud voices on the right, we have very loud voices on the left, and in the middle is an exhausted majority that’s afraid to speak because they’re afraid of getting their heads bitten off,” says Lisa Brandt, a co-founder of Reclaiming Civility.

“We’re not here to change anyone’s views on the issues,” says Braver Angels spokesperson Gabbi Timmis. “We’re here to change their views of each other.”

The local events kick off with a free, hourlong session oMonday that will introduce people to the importance of civility and lead them through two activities designed to decrease polarization.

Next, three daylong training and debate sessions will be held on the third Saturdays of June, July and August. Participants will spend the mornings learning the skills they need to practice civility.

After lunch they’ll divide into Blue (liberal) and Red (conservative) teams and put that training to work as they debate some of the most divisive topics of the day, including transgender issues, gun rights and religious freedom (See event details.)

Brandt says many people are fed up with incivility, and some want to do something about it, but good intentions aren’t enough if people lack the required skills.

“Thinking is not the same as doing,” she says.

That’s why Braver Angels teaches simple practices people can follow to keep discussions cool instead of adding gasoline to the flames. Civility doesn’t come through clamming up or avoiding tough topics, but by addressing them in ways that don’t turn other people into mortal enemies.

Guidelines for engagement

Braver Angels is a national nonprofit founded in 2016 that has brought together about 63,000 people to participate in about 5,000 local events. The group seeks to lessen the societal discord and personal harms caused by an absence of civil discourse.

Braver Angels has not been active in the Springs before, even though some residents have supported the national organization. Glenn Stanton, a family researcher at Focus on the Family and a Braver Angels board member, did not respond to a request for comment.

A Douglas County chapter of Braver Angels has been active since 2018. One participant said the Douglas County workshops had given her hope for the nation and the future.

Braver Angels forms alliances with local organizations like Reclaiming Civility, which teaches civility to businesses and groups, to organize events.

Reclaiming Civility teaches that many Americans have a problem: They lack civility and empathy for others and the way they communicate — unleashing unfiltered opinions or authoring inflammatory social media posts —i ncreases hostility.

The consequences include social anxiety, isolation, friend group division and family estrangement, something Brandt experienced with her sister-in-law after the 2024 presidential election.

The solution to incivility begins with our attitudes, some of them unintentional. Training helps people be more self-aware, grow their emotional intelligence, build their relational skills, and embrace a healthy dose of intellectual humility by acknowledging that no one has a lock on the truth.

Civility is built through a skill set that emphasizes understanding, empathy, respectful communication, positive body language, bridge-building, and the ability to deescalate conflict — practices Brandt has been following for the past seven years.

Conservatives needed

The upcoming civility events are not the first time Springs residents have worked to overcome division and build community. The city’s 1,000 Neighborhood Gatherings program championed by Mayor Yemi Mobolade saw neighbors hold 880 gatherings during its 2024 campaign.

Earlier, divisions surrounding 1992’s Amendment 2 led to the creation of two local bridge-building efforts. The Center for Christian-Jewish Dialogue organized local events until founder Rabbi Howard Hirsch retired and moved away in 2013. Dialogue Dinners organized small gatherings where hundreds of liberals and conservatives met over a series of meals in people’s homes. The gatherings ceased during the COVID pandemic.

Organizers of these past efforts often found that liberals were more likely to sign up for dialogue than conservatives.

Brandt, a Christian who’s becoming active in local Republican politics, hopes she can recruit enough conservatives to achieve a good blue-red balance. She believes some in her tribe could benefit from the training.

“I don’t know what it’s like on the Democrat side, but in the GOP there’s an isolationist mentality, and there are a lot of people who profess faith who are not treating each other civilly,” she says.

For Brandt, civility means more than playing nice. It’s fundamental to her Christian faith.

“Being a Christ follower includes understanding that every human being has inherent value and worth, and to not treat others with respect is not conforming to Christ’s command to love our neighbors,” she says.

She knows incivility is a huge problem, but she has faith she can make a difference.

“If I didn’t believe it was possible to make a change, I wouldn’t be engaged in this,” she says.