People learn about sex in all sorts of ways.

Conversations with friends, health class in school, parents, the internet, books, movies.

But what if there’s another resource for sex education?

Since 2001, First Congregational Church has offered Our Whole Lives, a secular national sex education program developed by the Unitarian Universalist Association and the United Church of Christ. OWL, as it’s commonly called, is sometimes used in faith-based settings that align with the curriculum’s core values: self-worth, sexual health, responsibility and justice and inclusivity.

“Sexuality is a big life force,” said Lynn Young, who was trained at the national level to become an OWL facilitator at First Congregational Church.

“Knowledge is power. Research shows this is not taking the place of anybody else. Parents have a tremendous role to play in their children’s lives, and schools have a tremendous role and churches also. When all three are offering, that shows up in the lives of children and people. They are better.”

OWL grew out of the Unitarian tradition, which created sexuality education in the 1970s. In the ’80s, the United Church of Christ affirmed it at a national level, and in the ’90s, the Unitarian Universalist Association and the United Church of Christ collaborated by hiring professional sexuality educators and creating the materials.

Much shame and stigmatizing around sexuality has been done in the name of the church, says Amy Johnson, the minister for sexuality, education and justice in the national ministries of the United Church of Christ. She’s also a sexuality educator who helped write OWL materials and train facilitators.

“And we know that can be fatal,” she said. “We know it from statistics around suicidality in LGBTQ and folks in general that it’s important to be in conversation as churches and providing factual, medically accurate, positive information about bodies and relationships to youth and adults. It’s life giving and life saving.”

OWL isn’t just for young people. It also offers education for older folks. Seven levels are offered altogether: kindergarten through first grade; grades four through six; grades seven to nine; grades 10-12; young adults ages 18-35, adults; and ages 55 and older.

First Congregational Church started with the grades seven-nine curriculum in 2001: “In sexuality education, it’s a time of urgency,” Young said.

That particular level is 24 hours long. Students meet in periodic 90-minute sessions and the occasional retreat over the course of an academic year. Classes for younger students are shorter — the kindergarten and first grade program consists of eight workshops and goes over body parts, differences in bodies and honoring that diversity. There are also some teachings about gender, sexual abuse and safety.

“The other thing is babies and how babies are made or how families are made,” Young said. “Parents are involved in helping choose the story that feels right — this is what we’d like to be shared with our kids right now about how people become families. It’s not explicit. It’s not the stuff that comes later.”

Classes are part lecture and part experiential. For example, one workshop, which teaches about sexually transmitted infections, uses M&Ms to get the point across. Students trade colors of the candies without seeing what’s in each other’s bags.

“We say ‘what did you learn, why is that important, what does it have to do with the topic, and what will you take away from the activity and into your life?’” Johnson said.

“One of the things that is a strength is how long we take to process activities. It’s not just information that changes behavior — they all have the information on their phones — it’s the critical-thinking skills.”

Over the years, the church has offered each level of OWL. First Congregational rolled out the program for adults over 55 for the first time last year. It was so popular there was a wait list.

“There are a lot of life changes sort of similar to puberty or when you’ve retired or lost a spouse to death or a relationship has broken up,” said Sarah Lund, First Congregational’s OWL program coordinator.

“There are a lot of life changes that impact your sexuality and health conditions that can impact how our bodies work. Sometimes, older adults don’t have the education and information about that aspect of their lives.”

Lund, whose 14-year-old daughter has done the first three levels of OWL, praises the program for being a safe space for kids to talk about sensitive topics.

“When she has questions she doesn’t want to ask parents, I love that she has safe adults who are knowledgeable,” said Lund, who’s also First Congregational Church’s children’s ministry director.

And she’s noticed her daughter isn’t afraid to talk about what she’s learned.

“She’s not embarrassed,” Lund said. “We’d talk about some of the things and she’d say ‘yep, that’s how it is.’ We can talk about things, and it’s not a big deal.”

Lund also has noticed the difference between the nonabstinence-based OWL and the abstinence-based sex education her daughter has received at school.

“Why would we hold public school kids to a standard that seems more suited to a religious context?” Lund said. “There are more facts and talking about birth control (at school), but I don’t think she’s gotten a lot of that yet. There’s a lot of talk in sixth grade about relationships and how to know if you’re in a healthy or unhealthy relationship. You don’t get a lot of facts. OWL gives a lot of information, maybe before they’re ready, but it’s good to know it’s back there in your head.”

Instead of teaching kids to wait for marriage to have sex, OWL is a comprehensive sexuality education program, Lund says. First Congregational Church uses a supplement alongside the curriculum that integrates a faith portion into the material.

“Faith and sexuality are linked,” she said. “It’s the best place for kids to learn about sexuality in a spiritual context.”

Contact the writer: 636-0270