Whenever Colorado Springs native Josh Skaggs feels like he’s losing patience or getting angry, the 36-year-old school teacher reminds himself of this: not too long ago, he was a stranger to the preteen and teen boys who now live in his home. They didn’t choose to be removed from their previous home or to be placed under his care.

“It’s really important to remember they didn’t put themselves in that situation,” he said. “They didn’t choose to be a foster kid; they’re just trying to grow up and survive and find their way.”

But foster care is surrounded by stigma and misperceptions that can make adults hesitant to open their hearts and homes to children who are in pain and need a little extra love, he said.

Most of the kids he works with haven’t had a dad around and have only experienced negative portrayals of masculinity and what it means to be a man, Skaggs said.

“So it’s important for men in communities to step up and show a different view of what masculinity can look like, and that takes a lot of courage because it hasn’t been modeled very well,” he said. “Men have to be willing to go beyond what they’ve seen and invest in other people’s lives.”

For taking his own advice and displaying other dedication in being a superhero foster dad, Skaggs is one of five Coloradans the state Department of Human Services is honoring on Saturday, in recognition of May being National Foster Care Month.

“I was just going about my day when I got news I’d received the award and was really surprised,” he said. “It feels like a big honor.”

Currently 3,448 children and youth live with Colorado’s 2,471 certified kinship and foster families, according to the state Department of Human Services.

In El Paso County, 614 children and adolescents live in out-of-home placement situations due to child abuse or neglect, statistics show.

“All children deserve and benefit from enduring, positive relationships with caring adults,” said El Paso County Department of Human Services Children, Youth, and Family Services Director Catania Jones.

“When a child’s parents are experiencing a time of particular crisis and unable to provide for their child’s essential well-being, foster resources can be key for supporting the journey back to safe and together families.”

Some of this year’s award-winning families are being lauded for their efforts in supporting harder-to-place older adolescents, facilitating reunification with biological parents or guardians, and working with youth who have higher needs and may otherwise have been sent to a group home.

Being a foster parent is tough but gratifying, Skaggs said.

He and the two brothers he temporarily cares for enjoy rock climbing, playing basketball, riding bikes, watching TV and doing other stuff. “Normal things teen boys like to do,” he said.

But adolescent boys struggle with other changes in addition to having to move out of their homes, as hormonal fluctuations occur while they’re encountering personal uncertainty.

“Those years are hard automatically for any person coming of age; there’s so much transition and emotions,” Skaggs said.

Being the adult trying to create a safe and warm environment in the midst of that can be difficult.

“I’m trying to help them stay regulated and process life,” Skaggs said.

The foster care agency he works with and friends help him figure out what’s normal, what’s not, what he should be doing or not.

“Even on my most difficult days I go to bed feeling it was worth it,” Skaggs said. “Seeing them grow and heal and get to be a kid is really rewarding.”

After volunteering to mentor at-risk youth in the past and encountering children in the foster care system in his job as a teacher, Skaggs said he felt the desire to take his involvement a step further and apply to become a foster parent.

He began training with Courage Community Foster Care agency in February of 2022 and by July of that year was certified.

“Being a foster dad is tiring and beautiful at the same time,” he said, adding that he highly recommends it.

Colorado has many foster children in need of home placement, according to the Department of Human Services.

In El Paso County, there continues to be a need for foster homes willing to take in complex and high-needs youth, Jones said, adding that the end goal is reunification with the children’s families.

“DHS staff works on strengthening families, so their homes are safe and supportive places,” she said.

Human Services contracts with approved foster care agencies and also works with schools, faith and civic organizations, law enforcement and the judiciary system “toward the goal of positively affecting the lives of children in out-of-home care,” Jones said.

For more information, see the county human services’ website at https://humanservices.elpasoco.com.