Mom touched, uplifted the lives of many
Unconditional love. We often hear this phrase in today’s society but few of us have witnessed it and even fewer have practiced it.
My mother epitomized this concept in the love she showed my brother and me as well as others. In my mother’s eyes my brother and I could do no wrong. We apparently had been immaculately conceived because we had no faults nor committed any sins. If something bad occurred, it was due to a mistake on her part or because others led us astray or were the true guilty parties. The grandchildren were even more special. In my mother’s eyes all of them were exceptional. She treasured photos and stories of them and even built special photo albums of each, much like a fan of a rock star might.
Education was important to my mother. She would often say that an “education is the one thing that no one can ever take away from you.” She loved learning and excelled in school to the point that she skipped two grades and graduated when she was 16. It was her dream to go to college and become a teacher because she loved children. That vision was unfortunately dashed with the stock market crash and the Great Depression that ensued. My grandfather lost almost everything and he had to break the news and her heart by telling her that they could not afford college.
Living through the Depression, further ingrained the importance of education to my mother as she saw better educated people fare better than others during that difficult time. While my mother could not go to college, she was determined that my brother and I received a good education and had the opportunity to go.
While my mother may have not gone to college, she was a voracious reader and she imparted a fount of wisdom which still guides my life today. One of her favorite adages was that “everyone has a skill or a talent, the key is discovering it.” This advice has helped me not only to discover my own skills and talents but to look for them in others and try to help those individuals develop and better appreciate their unique qualities.
Later in life I came to realize how important my mother was not only to us but so many others. She had a wide array of friends, some from very long ago while others may be the salesperson at a department store, the teller at the bank, the grocery bagger, and many more who may have met her only a few weeks earlier. Her smile and genuine kindness drew people to her and almost instantly they viewed her as a close friend or confidant.
While my mother wasn’t a psychologist, she probably seemed like one to many because of her innate ability to understand people and comprehend their problems. The key was that she had a true concern for people and they recognized it. She was also a good listener to whom people felt comfortable to unburden their problems with the confidence that it would go no further nor that my mother would judge them.
All of us need someone like that at different times in our lives and for many, my mother was that person. People would often call or drop by to speak with my mother and discuss their latest issue or problem, seek her guidance, or merely talk. In some cases these “office visits” took place over coffee in our kitchen and may last for an hour or more. I would frequently overhear at the end of those conversations my mother tell someone that she would pray for them. Even for those who were not religious, this meant something to them. It let them know that someone truly cared and was in their corner.
At the end of many of those conversations I could see a sense of relief or even a smile on the faces of many when they left. Somehow my mother had bolstered their confidence, let them know they were special, and that better days were ahead.
While my mother passed away over 10 years ago, I still feel her presence especially when I’m facing difficult decisions or choices. At those times it feels like I’m wearing an invisible bracelet with the letters WWMD on it — “What Would Mom Do?” I hope that phantom bracelet and that feeling never leave me.
Greg Fulton, a 40-year Denver resident, is the president of the Colorado Motor Carriers Association, which represents over 600 companies directly involved in and affiliated with trucking in Colorado.
