A month after Staff Sgt. David Nowaczyk’s death, his birthday passed quietly. So did the Fourth of July.

On Thanksgiving, Rachel Nowaczyk made a small meal, one in the comfort of her own home. She remembered fixing her late husband a plate. She ate. “It sat there,” she said. “I had an empty chair at the table.”

For Rachel Nowaczyk, the first Christmas without her husband tugs fresh at the reality of war — a prospect she met with reluctant grief, just like every other holiday since the sergeant’s death April 15.

Rachel Nowaczyk planned to travel to Florida. She tried ignoring Christmas. She got “the hell out of Dodge.” And she felt a shared pain.

Eleven Fort Carson soldiers died in Afghanistan in 2012, as did an Air Force major who deployed with the 4th Infantry Division’s 4th Brigade Combat Team to coordinate airstrikes.

A January roadside bomb claimed the life of an airman from Peterson Air Force Base’s 21st Space Wing — the first loss in Iraq or Afghanistan for the unit. Other troops who grew up or attended school in the Pikes Peak region died in 2012.

Each service member’s family reacted differently.

“The minute it happens, if I didn’t have the kids, I probably would have wanted to be with him,” Rachel Nowaczyk said.

On April 15, three vehicles rolled past the bomb that detonated and killed David Nowaczyk. An explosives team had declared the area clear of explosives moments earlier, according to a report released by the Defense Department.

The sergeant died immediately. Five other soldiers were killed in the blast.

Back in Indiana, where Rachel Nowaczyk stayed during his deployment, a military officer came to her door.

She refused to answer it — breaking instead into tears.

Numbness set in. She cried for days, working through each stage of grief.

Rachel heard phones ring and thought David was on the other end. She found herself thinking “He’s just on a long mission, or maybe a prisoner or war somewhere.”

The two met while Nowaczyk was on leave from his first deployment to Afghanistan. Two more deployments followed.

“He just loved his job and he just wanted to really be a part of helping save America and keep everyone safe and free,” Rachel Nowaczyk said. “And he was good at it. He was a great shot.”

But more and more, he started thinking about life after the service — focusing on two things that might guide his future.

Blessed with a wicked golf swing, David Nowaczyk aspired to get his PGA Tour card. During lunch breaks, Rachel Nowaczyk often caught him stopping at home and making away with his clubs.

“I’m like, ‘What are you doing?’ ” Rachel Nowaczyk said, laughing. “He’s supposed to be at work, and he’s sneaking off to the golf course instead.”

When he wasn’t playing golf, he was cuddling with his daughter Kiley, a 1-year-oldwhen he deployed for the last time. Sometimes he mixed his two loves.

He wheeled her stroller to the driving range or placed her in a bouncy chair while he hit golf balls into a net at their Fountain house.

“It ended up being perfect that we had a girl because he was just in love with her,” Rachel Nowaczyk said. “I mean, she was absolutely everything to him.”

Since April, Kiley has kept asking for Dad.

“She doesn’t understand what heaven is,” Rachel Nowaczyk said. “She wants to go to heaven to see Daddy. And she keeps looking in the sky and looking for him.”

Rachel Nowaczyk entered the marriage with a boy, Connor, 8. He has found solace in visiting his biological father in Chicago.

There have been holiday gatherings, but Rachel can’t find a festive mood. For Christmas, she and the kids flew to Florida.

“I guess it doesn’t get easier,” she said. “You just learn to deal with the hand you’ve been dealt.”

Staff Sgt. David Nowaczyk had a daughter, Kiley, with his wife, Rachel, who had a son, Connor, before their marriage. Photo by COURTESY PHOTO

Staff Sgt. David Nowaczyk Photo by COURTESY PHOTO

Staff Sgt. David Nowaczyk Photo by COURTESY PHOTO

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