By Donna McMurtry

Renee Good was my cousin before she was shot and killed in Minneapolis. Before the entire nation began watching the shooting from multiple angles and before it became the latest political battleground.

Renee’s grandmother and mine were sisters, born 19 months apart in a tiny log cabin in Divide. That cabin still stands beside the larger homestead house our great-grandpa built. Renee has half a dozen relatives here in Teller County. Dozens more in Colorado Springs, Denver and across the midwest. She has an older sister and three younger brothers. She died on her sister’s birthday.

It’s been equal parts fascinating and disturbing to observe the discussions of friends and colleagues. I write about her now because many don’t know what to believe. Yesterday a friend stated “I don’t believe any of it. Things like this wouldn’t happen to some random woman from Colorado Springs.” Interesting logic, but I totally understand.

Decades ago I stopped watching the news. Being involved in a handful of events, then seeing the misleading spins and untruths repeated by every news station and reporter, showed me how manipulative and intentionally polarizing big media had become.

Renee’s murder incited deeply held beliefs and a whole lot of resentments. Today in Costco an elderly stranger said to me, “Better watch out for ICE. You’re a white woman.” I asked him to repeat his comment. “I’m a Vietnam Veteran. Served this country for 30 years.” He said. Then proceeded to rail bitterly against the current administration. This surprised me.
“She was paid to protest.” Another friend stated with certainty. “She knew what she was doing, what the risks were. She was breaking the law.” I’ll spare you the spewing and name-calling that followed. The kicker being; not one of the arguers of either side based their statements on truth. It was all speculation and opinion.

But her death more often incites compassion. I’ve witnessed such fierce grace given to this woman being scrutinized, condemned or heroized by a nation.
To you Gracious Ones; Thank you for your decency. I see you risk keyboard firing squads and vicious word-flinging to simply express concern or sadness over the violent loss of a human. You remind me it’s more important to be kind than opinionated. You demonstrate that honoring a tragedy trumps maintaining a political stance, and having compassion should always outweigh judging who was wrong or right.

I don’t know what the Agent who shot Renee is experiencing these days, or what his family is enduring. I don’t know why he did what he did and I won’t draw conclusions unless I walk in his shoes. But I know he and Renee both deserve dignity. I suspect both of them are equally flawed and loveable and incredibly precious to their families.

Here’s something I’ve learned, yet again; Grace is the most appropriate response. The most intelligent and honorable offering we can make to each other is to remember; we are brothers and sisters in humanity.